Is answering a question *teaching*?
Is demonstrating *how* to do something teaching?
Is there a difference between *showing* and *teaching*?
Can one exist without the other?
Do people NEED to be *taught*?
That's what unschooling mostly is for me right now,
it's figuring out the logistics and the details of *what* it IS exactly-
what it is to ME,
how I define it
so that I/we can truly LIVE it.
I have a lot of questions about coercion and using *distracting* as parenting/unschooling *methods*.
there seems to be a bit of coercion lurking in other unschooling families and it surprises me.
I'm not sure about using *distraction* as a parenting technique, and it's a technique I hear a lot.
I'm not a co-counselor or an RC person but I do think that maybe there is something to NOT *distracting* kids/people from their feelings
but instead *allowing* them to actually experience them so they can get rid of them. Let them goooooooooooooo.
Looks like it's time for me to bust out some reading material.
posted by d @ 8:27 AM
2 comments
2 Comments:
I believe in minimizing the role of coercion and distraction in our lives -- but I don't know how to totally eradicate it. If my toddler doesn't feel like riding in her carseat I'll stop the car and take her out to nurse and comfort her, but don't feel safe letting her ride outside of it ... we do avoid spending much time in the car at this particular stage of her life.
Also, if my toddler's making a bee-line for my six-year-old's section of the yard (where my six-year-old goes to construct things she doesn't want messed with), I do scoop her up and distract/re-direct her. I try not to distract her just for my personal convenience, but I can't claim I'm NEVER guilty of this.
I try to back off and let my six-year-old take charge of her hygeine as much as possible (for me). I do insist on toothbrushing, at least once a day before bed (I do my own 2-3 times a day), because we haven't eliminated refined sugars and processed foods from our home, and I feel teeth are an important resourse and my kids will appreciate having healthy ones in the future, even if they don't fully understand why they need to be brushed right now.
Oh, and I agree that it's better to avoid distraction as much as possible, and simply make the adjustments we need to make so our children can truly follow their own interests and have a fuller experience of life.
When my toddler shoves things into her mouth, I only pull them out if they could be harmful (i.e., could cause choking or be poisonous or hurt her if she swallowed them). I like to let her taste as much of the world as she safely can. Chewing on sticks is pretty safe, I think!
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